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Grandparents step in to raise five girlsBy TAMARA LUSH © St. Petersburg Times, published December 24, 2000 Tina Dean doesn't care what she gets for Christmas, because she knows she can't have what she really wants.
In August, three men went to a Flora Avenue home with the hopes of stealing drugs, but police said they shot Robert Dean, who was housesitting, in the process. Dean left behind five daughters. Their grandparents -- Dean's in-laws -- now have custody of the girls, and this is an empty Christmas for the family in more ways than one. Katena and Evangelos Hiou moved from Massachusetts to a two-bedroom home at 4033 Baden Drive in Holiday 10 years ago. They expected their golden years to be filled with Caribbean cruises and sunset dinners on the Sponge Docks. And for a while, they were -- until their daughter Elaine left Robert Dean and their five daughters. At first, Elaine made sporadic visits to her family, but she has not contacted them since March. The Hious don't know where she is. Now, the Hious are trying to raise the girls with old-world values; they grew up in small villages in Greece a half-century ago. It's a tough challenge in today's world of $125 sneakers, Britney Spears bell-bottom pants and boys in fast cars. "I have no choice," said Evangelos Hiou, who is 63. "You've got to believe in God. Maybe God will pay me in some other place." The family survives on $1,600 a month in Social Security income, $200 a month from Evangelos' pension and $800 a month from Katena Hiou's full-time job at a Tarpon Springs manufacturer. There is little left over after the $700 mortgage, $500 van payment and $200 for health insurance and medication each month. "I pray to God that somebody will help these kids, help for the future," said 65-year-old Katena Hiou, who is known to her granddaughters as Ya-Ya. "I worry for the future." Memories of Christmas past Tina is the youngest. Then there's Jackie, who is 11; Angie, 12; and Nikki, 13. The oldest is 15, and she didn't want her name in this story; of all the girls, she's having the most difficult time with her father's death. She is rarely at the house, stopping by with friends to munch on some snacks, get money from Ya-Ya and kiss her goodbye. "I'll call you!" the oldest says, as she walks out the door. "Listen, call me!" Ya-Ya says loudly, in a thick Greek accent. "Bye, honey! Be good girl! Out of trouble!" Tina, Jackie and Angie spend the most time with Ya-Ya and their grandfather, whom they call Pa-Po. The three youngest girls go to church with their grandparents at St. Nicholas in Tarpon Springs every Sunday. They eat dinner on Wednesdays at McDonald's -- 99-cent Happy Meal night -- and the girls constantly tease, hug and laugh with their grandparents. In many ways, the Hious are the only full-time parents the younger ones have ever known: They took the girls in seven years ago when their daughter, Elaine, walked out. Yet the girls' father continued to be a big presence in their lives, even though he couldn't afford to make a home for them. As a handyman, he had a flexible schedule, stopping by three and four times a day. Each weekend, he would take the girls biking on the Pinellas Trail or swimming on Clearwater Beach. On school nights, he would stop by to kiss them goodnight. He also provided a financial boost. In addition to giving the Hious $200 a week to help care for the girls, he would pay the $800 in annual property taxes for the Hious' home. He also bought the girls toys and games. Last Christmas, for instance, he bought the five a computer to share. But the memory of the day is sweeter than any gift he gave. He came over, early, and fell asleep on the floor. The girls piled on top of him, woke him up, and they opened presents. They got him underwear, socks, T-shirts. Then he took them all to Waffle House, and he ordered blueberry pancakes. "His favorite," Angie said. After Dean died, the girls went through his truck, a refurbished U-Haul. Inside the cab, they found a camera with some film in it. They got it developed, and the photos chronicled his simple life: bathrooms he had renovated; friends; the Virgin Mary shrine at a Clearwater bank. Jackie keeps those photos in her bedroom in a small, red photo album. "I bought this photo album at Goodwill for 75 cents," Jackie said. They also found a compact disc by their dad's favorite band, Aerosmith. They think of him when they listen to his favorite song, called I Don't Want to Miss a Thing. "I could stay awake just to hear you breathing/Watch you smile while you are sleeping/While you are far away and dreaming. I don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep/Cause I miss you, baby, and I don't want to miss a thing." Hard times It's 8 p.m., five days before Christmas, and Ya-Ya is tired. She wakes up at 6 every morning, gets the kids ready for school, then goes to work. At lunch, she comes home to check on her husband, then goes back to work. He takes care of the girls when they get home from school, and when Ya-Ya comes home, she tries to get dinner on the table by 8 p.m. She has to clean and think about what to make for Christmas dinner, even though one of the burners on the stove is broken. And she has to do laundry at some point, then hang the wet clothes outside because she doesn't have a dryer. She's got Christmas shopping covered. Thank goodness relatives, Dean's friends and the Greek community have given gifts and money to the girls. There's no Christmas tree this year; under Greek tradition, when someone dies, the family does not decorate on the following Christmas. Ya-Ya laughs when asked if she has bought anything for herself recently. She's thinking about splurging this week when she gets her paycheck, on a pair of $20 work shoes at Wal-Mart. Hers have holes in them. But she's still worried -- about her husband (he had a stroke last February) and about her eyesight (she has glaucoma and had cataract surgery). And, as always, she's worried about the girls. Last month, she bought a bunk bed for the three youngest ones. Sometimes Tina sleeps with Jackie, sometimes with Angela, and sometimes with the older girls. The two oldest sleep on the couches in the living room or at friends' homes. Ya-Ya would like to buy the older girls beds and wanted to turn a portion of the den into a bedroom for the two older ones. Dean had bought the materials to do the work right before he died. She wants the girls to go to college and has started savings accounts in their names. But she hasn't been able to put money in the accounts for the past two months. Her eyes are already red from sleeplessness, but they get watery with tears. "If something happens to me, these kids don't have no one."
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